Diary of a Curvy Girl: a message to teens trying to understand their shape

Curvy girls, you are the empowered superwoman and some of you don’t even know it. You have the power to captivate just by walking into a room, but oh, My Love, when you speak and take action despite the limits they try to place on your feminine form… You are UNSTOPPABLE.

They want you to be the sex symbol, the booty-shaker, But what you are is who ever you choose to be.

And if you want to be the Success-symbol, the Creative-Symbol, the Political-shaker, the Revolutionary-symbol, the Change-maker, YOU ARE ALL OF THAT and more.

Their limits only hold influence if YOU LET IT.

So  here are a few things I wanted to say to you newly-curvy, the 13 to 17 year old who woke up to find a beautiful flow of curvy waves has now taken form.

  1. Some will look and it’s not your responsibility to change that. 

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(oogle (v) – meaning to stare either with wide eyes or lustful eyes and to linger the gaze for an extended and often uncomfortable length of time)

And while some will say you should hide your form entirely, it is not your responsibility to control the eyes of others.

I’m an advocate for not exposing too much, simply because our clothes do communicate our self-identity as well as how we desire to interact with the world, BUT I draw a line on how modest a girl should be simply because she has curves. ‘

You have a shape and it’s a beautiful personalized shape and you do not need to cover it in boxy or flouncy clothing, unless that’s your favorite style. Don’t do it because someone says your curves are “too much.” They are never too much, and always just right, because your shape is NATURALLY, organically YOU.

And there’s nothing more right than that.

2. Tight pants will annoy you. Embrace the softer side of tights. 


Speaking of clothing, jeans and tight slacks will drive you crazy if not made just right. Designers have still not solved the puzzle that is our very widely diverse shapes. But the tights, man, those things really love to hug and nurture your curves. I’ve embraced the beauty of the tights.

3. Your lover (if he or she is wise) will admire every curve, even the one around your belly area. 

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If at any point you find yourself dating someone or just interested in someone who doesn’t want you as you are. First of all, don’t assume it’s your shape that is the reason. It could be many other things.

But if it is, if someone actually says you should do something about your shape, they are not for you. You don’t tell a Dodge Challenger to shape-shift into a Corvette. Either you want a Challenger or a Corvette, so tell them to go get what they want.

You do not need to alter you, for any one else.

Are you not able to listen to music, play the games you want, go shopping, enjoy the water at the beach? Does life halt because of your shape?


So why should you stop your own joy in order to please someone?

“But what about the clothes though? I can’t wear the same things as other girl shapes!”

4. Your clothes will not fit you the same way they do other people, BUT THAT’S AWESOME! It means your form is one-of-a-beautiful-kind.


I remember a girl who was curvy earlier than some of us, and I hated the shirts she wore because she wore things that hid her shape and honestly made her look like a box up top. You do not need to hide your curves.

Be bold enough to wear the shirts that highlight your form. This is why I buy the long and thin shirts. They cover and flatter my curves and still have enough length to not show my belly when I move around.

Wear scarves, and skirts, and heels, or flats. Wear colors or grays. Whatever your heart wishes, but don’t get upset if something looks different on you. Nobody cares if it does or not.

It’s your attitude that determines how you look.

Wear what feels right with your spirit.

Dress for you, Love. Walk and talk as you please. Decorate your design however you choose. And any vision you wish to achieve, any experience you wish to have, it is yours to take, whenever and however you choose. 

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